Thursday, March 24, 2011

Selfless vs. Selfish

I've always heard that being a mom is one of the most selfless acts a woman can perform.  As soon as our child is born we want everything for them and we tend to forget about ourselves.  However, there have been times in my eleven years as a mother that I've found myself wanting to be selfish.  I want to watch a good television show without interruption, I want to watch a movie in silence, I want to type on the computer, I want to read a book, I want to write a book and I want to eat a snack or drink something without having to share it with anyone else.  I hide candy in the house just so I don't have to share it!  Yet other times I don't mind dropping everything no matter how much I'm enjoying what I was doing to listen to one of my kids tell me a story about their day or to fix them a snack or to share my snack with them.  Motherhood is definitely a balancing act. 

Recently I've been finding myself getting selfish again.  I have all these goals I want to accomplish but at 3:30 p.m. my day stops completely for my kids.  We've got homework, supper, bath time, and now sports practices and games.  I feel like there aren't enough hours in the day to accomplish all that I want to accomplish.  However, I constantly tell myself to relax and enjoy the children as much as possibly because they grow so fast and I'll have plenty of time to accomplish my dreams once they are in college. 

Even though I feel selfish I know part of me is still selfless because I'm still making sure they have everything they need and are getting to where they need to be even though I'm getting run down, tired and sick.  I know I need to take care of myself or I'm not going to do much good for them but sometimes in the whirlwind of things a person can forget to slow down.  I'm at that point right now.  I need to slow down for a minute and get healthy because there is no time to be sick.  I really enjoy my young mothers group because you realize that all moms go through very similar feelings and emotions.  We are normal, a lot of us hide candy in the house and a lot of us hide in our house.  We all need a moment of peace and quiet, we all need a moment to ourselves and we all need to remember that it's okay to be selfish once in a while.  It's what gets us through this crazy life of motherhood!

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