Monday, February 28, 2011

Kids Say the Darndest Thing AGAIN

I was thinking about my last post and couldn't believe the one story I forgot to mention so I will write about it here today.  It may actually top the cherry cock story.

My son was turning nine last summer and wanted to have a few friends over for a sleep over.  So we planned a party, brought three boys home with us one evening after football camp and after showers, pizza, cake and ice cream they decided to watch a movie.  My son had the Transformer movie and that is what they all agreed to watch.  Now I knew the movie was PG-13 yet I had seen it several times and didn't recall anything real bad in it so I let them watch it.

There was one place in the movie that was probably inappropriate for nine year old boys to watch and of course all of them caught it.  In the movie a teenage boy refuses to open the door to his bedroom and let his parents in.  When his parents finally do get in his mother asks him if he was masturbating.  One of my son's friends asked, 'What does masturbating mean?"  Of course I froze.  I mean how do I answer that?  These aren't my kids and I'm the horrible parent that let them watch this movie.  As I thought about how to answer that question not one but two of the boys beat me to it.  They said it's when you sit criss cross applesauce with your hands in the air and say, "Ohm".

Whew, I thought, they think it means meditation!!  I dodged a bullet there unless of course any of them have parents or family members who do meditate.  Ha!  I did tell their parents just in case. :)

I realize I am the worst at explaining awkward things like that to my kids.  I want them to stay little and not learn about that sort of stuff but it is inevitable and I better start being straight forward with them, just not when they have friends over!

Wednesday, February 23, 2011

A Quiet Day

Last night as I was fixing supper, washing dishes, sweeping the floor and changing batches of laundry my three year old was standing with the refrigerator door open screaming because I wouldn't let him have a snack ten minutes before supper, my nine year old was refusing to do his homework and my eleven year old was asking for help with her homework.  At that very moment I couldn't help but think about being somewhere else.  I was tired after a long day of working and doing mom chores and now I was still busy and I just wanted some quiet time. 

I thought about walking barefoot on a sandy beach.  I could feel the powdery sand between my toes and a cool breeze blowing through my hair.  The sun was bright and I felt it's warmth on my back.  I quickly snapped back to reality at the smell of burning meat.  I finished browning my burger and added a few more ingredients to the pot for chili and then I was thinking about a day shopping.  I thought it would be fun to get up in the morning, go shopping, stop for a sit down lunch with a friend, maybe get a massage, see a movie and come home to a clean house and well behaved children with slicked down hair and clean shirts on.  They'd greet me at the door, "Hello mother, we do hope you had a wonderful outing."

I'm laughing out loud thinking of that because typically when I do get a day away I come home to a messy house, three children trying to talk to me at once, one of them will have food on his face, another will have either wore yet another whole in the knee of his jeans or spilled something on his shirt at lunch that day.

The thing is we all deserve a quiet day now and then and we shouldn't feel guilty for taking them.  It's ironic how now we look forward to a quiet day here and there to break up the insane ones and one day we'll be looking forward to having them all come home for an insane day to break up the quiet ones. 

I think we should all try to schedule a quiet day in the near future.  Write down what you'd like to do or where you'd like to go.  Plan it out to make it the most refreshing and enjoyable for you.  If we can get a break now and then it will make us better mother's and don't our children deserve that.  You are taking a break from your kids FOR your kids. 

I've told myself for months and months that one of these days I'm just going to sit home by myself and watch movies all day and eat all my favorite foods. Or I'd love to sit home and read all day and eat my favorite foods.  Well, I know my day would consist of being home alone and eating. 

Arranging a bowl of flowers in the morning can give a sense of quiet in a crowded day - like writing a poem or saying a prayer.
Anne Marrow Lindbergh

Sunday, February 20, 2011

The Joys of Exercise

Why is it so hard to exercise?  I really don't mind exercising I can just think of ten million other things that need to be done and so that's why I didn't do it.  I've always had good intentions to exercise more, eat healthier and to take vitamins and supplements.  And just like a New Year's resolution my good intentions lasted a short while and I was back in my old ways.  When it comes to exercising and eating healthier I'm a talker and not a doer.  This drives my husband absolutely nuts.  He keeps telling me that if I want something bad enough then I'll stop making excuses and do it, blah, blah, blah.  I always felt like I wanted it bad enough but just didn't have time.  It wasn't until I was on Face book stalking a friend that I saw she had a picture of herself in a bikini mixed in her photos.  Someone had commented to her on how great she looked and she replied, "Thanks, I've worked really hard!"  You know what she had worked really hard, she biked, ran, lifted weights.  She found time to exercise daily despite the fact that she was a stay-at-home mom with two young boys.

I told myself that if she could do it than I could do it.  I started with a fun workout video three times a week and started feeling better.  My best friend found out and for my birthday bought me the same workout DVD she wanted to use and we decided we'd each do it five days a week on our own time.  Now I'm being held accountable for my actions and I don't want to disappoint her by not working out a day so I get up a half an hour earlier than normal and do my 35 minutes work-out video five times a week.  I feel so much better and am glad that I have support in doing it.  It's fun because we can talk about the exercises and the people on the video.  I hope that we continue supporting each other in our quest to be healthier.  We both want to feel good and have more energy to chase after our children.  We both have three children and we both run businesses from our homes.

Now that I enjoy my workouts and have the energy to do more I need to figure out a way to eat healthier.  I know what foods I'd like to eat but unfortunately my family are super picky eaters.  Well now that sounds like another excuse.  I know once I start eating healthier I'll feel even better and want to continue to eat better.  It's just starting to eat healthier that is the problem.  I love sweets, salty snacks and pretty much all foods that are bad for you.  I find fruits and vegetables boring and need to figure out a way to make them more attractive to me.  Ah, what would a mom do to get her kids to eat fruits and vegetables???  douse them in cheese, ranch or chocolate?  I think I can handle that.


Fitness - if it came in a bottle, everybody would have a great body.  ~Cher

Friday, February 18, 2011

Sleep More Sleep

It's two in the morning and I am toasty warm in my bed.  My sheets feel like velvet against my skin and I imagine my pillow and mattress are fluffy white clouds.  I am at peace in my soft comfortable bed so my lips curl into a smile.  My eyes are still closed because I am still asleep, well at least I was asleep until a small child crawls in to bed with me.  "Good morning, Mom.  I'm happy today," he says.  I barely open my eyes as I muster the strength to scoot over and help him under the covers.  I'm still comfortable and I'm still tired.  A few seconds go by and my three year old son moves, gets comfortable, moves again, his hand falls against my face, his knee is digging into my rib and his foot is on top of my leg.  I am fully awake now and realize my son has crawled in bed with my husband and I.  I sigh, throw the covers back and carrying my fifty pound son back to his room.  I cover him up, kiss him good night and then hurry to crawl back into my pocket of warmth.

I have come to the realization that I simply am not meant to sleep.  None of my children require the sleep my friends speak of.  I have friends who lay their kids down at seven at night and they sleep until seven in the morning never stirring once in the night.  My children on the other hand go to bed at nine are awake at two and again at six for the day.  My older two children didn't sleep consistently through the night or sleep later than six until they reached kindergarten and so now instead of wishing time away for my youngest to reach kindergarten age I am trying, the operative word being trying, to cherish the time that a small child wants to crawl in to bed with me in the early morning hours to snuggle.  In a few short years I will no longer have a small cuddly child in my home because he will grow into a strapping young kindergartner who will hopefully being sleeping through the night and sleeping in a bit longer than six.

Sleep deprivation seems to be a common side effect of motherhood and one I wish I could get used to.  I am one of those people that require my eight hours of recharging a night to function, my husband on the other hand could survive on five hours a night.  So I guess now you know where my children get it.  They have inherited their father's requirement for little sleep.

As I write this my eleven year old daughter is having her slumber party and they like totally need the laptop to look something up online so I must call it a night.  It's 9:30 p.m. and my three year old just feel asleep.  My nine year old is talking my ear off about how royalty works...if the king dies who inherits the crown?  Strange what this kids come up with.  I think I'm going to go lie on my comfy couch and rest.  I know that maybe tomorrow I can take a nap.

People who say they sleep like a baby usually don't have one.  ~Leo J. Burke

Thursday, February 17, 2011

It's Okay Girlfriends

Okay so here is where ALL the honesty comes out.  I have been blessed by a wonderful husband, beautiful children, a fun and supportive family of parents, siblings, cousins, aunts, uncles, niece, nephews, grandparents and in-laws and last but NOT least my chosen family of girlfriends.  I think every mother needs her girlfriends for support, for friendship and for laughter.

I have great friends who are mothers and who I can share with, laugh with and realize that we are all doing our best and that is okay!

So raise your hand, Who has fed their kids cold cereal for supper because you didn't feel like making a meal? It's Okay!

Who has made their child wear a pre-worn shirt or pair of pants or possibly dirty socks to school because they had gotten behind on the laundry?  It's Okay!

Who has had to get up in the middle of the night to remove a kids sheets because they peed the bed and was so tired that you either, just laid a blanket on the bed for them to sleep on, made them sleep on the couch or made them sleep on the floor because you didn't want to put clean sheets on their bed at that hour?  It's Okay!

Who has let their child go to bed at night without taking a bath after a hot sticky summer day and just figured you'd bath them and change their bedding the next day?  It's Okay!

Who has bribed a child with candy, money or a toy so that they'd do what you wanted?  It's Okay!

Who has let their kid eat food that's fallen on the ground?  Okay, I'll eat food that's fallen on the ground.  Once I even ate a Casey's doughnut that I dropped in the parking lot.  Yes I did and it was delicious!

Who has let their child do something even though you told them no but you were sick of listening to them whine?  It's Okay, as long as it doesn't happen often.

Who has ignored their child because you were watching a really good show? It's Okay, if it doesn't happen often.  If it does maybe you should tape your show and watch it after your kids are in bed.

Who has had the false impression that they could actually get a lot done with their kids at home and ended up screaming in frustration because you didn't get your To Do List accomplished?  It's Okay!

Who has told their child that when it rains it's God crying because of something they did?  Okay so that is one I just made up...It came from Deep Thoughts by Jack Handy.

Talking to other mothers and friends about the joys and stresses of motherhood is good for the mind, body and soul.  You are all in this together and if you can make each other laugh then I promise you'll get through the journey of motherhood together.  The journey will last your whole life, once you're a mom there is no going back.  So you may as well enjoy the ride.

"It is one of the blessings of old friends that you can afford to be stupid with them."
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

Take the Time to Slow Down

So somebody already called me out on an error I made in my last post.  I wrote, do your children know that they are the most important things in your life and what I meant to write was, do your children know that they are one of the most important things in your life.  Tough crowd!! Ha!  I'm just teasing, thanks for the comments, I really do appreciate them and hope that I receive more.

It seems in life that it is so easy to get caught up in the crazy day-to-day activities and stresses that we don't stop to just take a breath, sit back and look at what's really important.  We are all busy, raising children can be super stressful and a lot of us would like to try to have our own lives as well.

I was recently watching The Talk when a famous actress told the audience about a mistake she had made that forced her to look at her life and to slow down.  She was a super busy mom as we all are, she had her baby with her and was running errands and decided to stop into a Starbucks for some coffee.  She thought to save time she'd leave the baby in the car and run in by herself since she was just going to be a minute.  While in the coffee shop she ran into a friend, and then another friend and before she knew it several minutes had passed and she had totally forgotten about her baby locked inside her car.  It wasn't until she heard a commotion just outside the coffee shop did she realize what she had done and raced out to her car.  Several people had noticed the baby alone in the car and when they realized she was the mother they started calling her nasty names and saying awful things to her.  She said that she started shaking and felt sick to her stomach.  She felt guilty about what she had down and then one day she realized that if she was going to get anything good at all out of it she would turn it into a lesson learned by her and share it with other mothers so that they don't make the same mistake.

I will admit that I've been so consumed with the busyness of life that I've made a similar mistake.  When my middle child was four years old I had a friend pick him up from preschool and drop him off at his babysitters house.  I had so much going on that week that I forgot that I had told my babysitter that I was going to take that day off from work and that my son wouldn't be going there that day.  Since she wasn't expecting my son that afternoon she took the rest of the daycare kids on a field trip.  My friend dropped my son off at door, watched him go inside the house and left.  Once my son realized his babysitter wasn't home he spent the next thirty minutes walking up and down the side-walk screaming for her.  When the babysitter got home and found him she immediately called me and I felt sick.  My stomach sank and I thought I was going to throw up. My husband and I picked up our son and had to go to our daughters elementary track and field day.  I remember sitting on the bleachers shaking and sick to my stomach.  I apologized to my son over and over and held him in my arms.  I could I have been such a terrible mother?  That  evening my husband sat down with me and discussed the fact that I needed to slow down.  I was commuting to work and trying to be their for my kids and for me it was not working.  Less than two months later I started working from home.

I know many mothers who can handle an enormous amount of obligations with poise and grace.  They are always organized and on top of things and do everything with a smile.  I am not one of those mothers.  I do the best I can but I do need help now and then and I'm not afraid to ask for it.  My children have clean clothes, I make them decent meals, they have a comfy bed and they know they are loved.

I still think about the day that my son was left all alone and how it was all my fault.  But it reminds me to continue to evaluate my time and to realize that if I'm getting too busy again that I need to slow down before it's too late. 

Sometimes it's important to work for that pot of gold.  But other times it's essential to take time off and to make sure that your most important decision in the day simply consists of choosing which color to slide down on the rainbow.  ~Douglas Pagels, These Are the Gifts I'd Like to Give to You

Tuesday, February 15, 2011

Look within yourself to be a better Mom

I will write about the topic above but first if my adult ADD can kick in I must share this awesome website I found where you can create your own chocolate bar!  It's called chocomize.com and this is how it works.  First, choose what kind of chocolate you want milk, dark or white.  Second, choose the type of ingredients who want to add like gummy bears, cookie dough, dried blueberries, bacon, white chips, peanut butter drops, toffee etc.  They have over 100 ingredients who could add.  I created five of these bars for my family for Valentine's Day and in typical fashion I ordered them too late so my family will be enjoying them later this week. ;)

Okay so back to the title: Look within yourself to be a better Mom

As mothers we hold high hopes for our children and we want children who can thrive.  So here are some tips I've found: 
1.  Make sure your parenting reflects your high priority of raising your children.  In other words do your children know that they are the most important thing in your life?

2. Imagine your children grown to teens or adults.  What do you want their lives to look like?  What qualities and traits do you believe will help them get to that place.  For me this is scary.  I am just trying to do the best job I can do as a mom and when they leave the house I hope and pray I gave them enough tools to become happy individuals who can contribute to society in a positive way.

3.  I have read that we teach our children in three important ways:  the first is by example, the second is by example and the third is by example.  If you are reading this and thinking, "Wow, I think my children will turn out great."  then good for you.  If you are thinking, "Oh man my kids are so screwed."  I assure you, you aren't alone.  Ha!  We are only human, we make mistakes, the important thing is that we learn from those mistakes, pick ourselves up and move on.

4. No endeavor is more important than raising children, yet it's easy to just try to get through it.  Set aside time to think and plan big and little ways to reach your parenting goals.  Plan game night once a week, or plan to spend individual time with each child during the month.  It doesn't have to be a lot, every effort counts.

5. Commit to the fact that little that is worthwhile comes easy.  Give your parenting the conviction, purpose and effort it deserves.  I realize not everyone has time to meet on a regular basis with other mothers but I think my young mother's group has really helped me continue to do the best job I can.  Everyone is so helpful and understanding.  We all make some of the same mistakes and we are all learning from them. There is no such thing as a perfect mom and their is no such thing as a perfect child, just love, live and be happy.

When you are a mother, you are never really alone in your thoughts. A mother always has to think twice, once for herself and once for her child.  Sophia Loren

Monday, February 14, 2011

Amazing Kid Story

I am never more proud of my children then when they show an act of kindness.  It is so sweet that my son loves getting letters from his pen pal at the nursing home, or my almost four year old shares his treats from holidays or school with the rest of his family.  When I was a child I think I was a treat hoarder and well I didn't really hoard them because I ate all of my candy so fast but I didn't like to share it with anyone.  My eleven year old is so sweet when she sees that her littlest brother is driving me crazy and she'll just take him and read to him or play with him and I don't even have to ask.  But this recent Amazing Kid story is about a child that is not my own.  Here's how the story goes:

My in-laws invited my husband and I to a National Wildlife Turkey Federation banquet in a neighboring town this past Saturday night and we were looking forward to a night out.  We hired a sitter for the kids and headed out for the evening.  At the banquet my husband noticed a kids game where the prize was a Red Rider bb gun.  We had bought a Red Rider bb gun for our oldest son a few years ago at a banquet and thought it would be great if we could get one to save for our youngest son.  The object of the game was to drop quarters in a gigantic jar of water and get them to land in one of three shot glasses in the bottom.  Since we didn't have our children with us we asked some friends of ours, who brought their kids, if we could borrow their seven year old daughter for the game.  The little girl was happy to play the game for us and she did a great job and won us several tickets.  We put our number 41 on all of the tickets and threw them into the bin.  The little girl was also playing for herself and won several chances to which she put her number, 39 on the tickets.

It came time for the Red Rider bb gun drawing and the number drawn was 39.  We were thrilled she won the gun for herself and she looked so proud as she walked up to receive her gun.  Her picture was taken for the local paper and she carried her bb gun in a box back to her seat.  About five minutes later she approached my husband and I with her mom and the box carrying the bb gun.  Her mother explained to us that the little girl had told both of her parents earlier in the night that if she won the gun she'd like to give it to our son.  We were in shock and of course told her that definitely was not necessary but we greatly appreciated her kindness.  She explained that she had actually been playing the game for our son the whole time because she already had two bb guns at home and she insisted we take the Red Rider gun.  I was almost in tears, it really meant a lot to me that this little girl wanted to give my son a prize that she won.

I gave her a hug and the next day had our almost four year old son call her and thank her on the phone.  He was so excited and said, "I thank you soooooo much for my gun.  That was really nice of you."   I sent her a picture of my son holding his new gun and will be sending her something special in the mail for her kindness.  It still amazes me that such a young child did this and I think she set a great example for my children to follow.

How far you go in life depends on your being tender with the young, compassionate with the aged, sympathetic with the striving and tolerant of the weak and strong.  Because someday in your life you will have been all of these.  ~George Washington Carver

Preserving Memories

As mother's many of us can get overwhelmed by how fast time flies when are kids are home.  We have all of the hopes and dreams of family vacations, and making scrapbooks, taking pictures and keeping some sort of record of what our lives were like with our kids at home.  A lot of times our children may not appreciate these things now but they will when they are our age.  I know love looking back at old photographs or reading old notes and letters.  I fully intended on having beautifully crafted scrapbooks for each of my children but man are hey time consuming and will be lucky if I have one finished for each of them by the time they graduate.  I also have noticed that my picture taking as decreased over the years hence the reason why it seems in a lot of families there are tons of pictures of the first child and those numbers seem to dwindle by the time you get to the third or fourth.

The one thing I am now so glad I did was at least start a journal for each of them when they were born.  I started with the day they were born and write in them when I think of it.  I kept details of how much they weighed and how tall they were at each well-child care visit, when they started to crawl or walk, when they got their first tooth.  Now I keep track of who their friends are, what their interests are and what their favorite toys are. I know someday they will love to read these books.

I never had much interest in family history until I was married with children.  Now I love looking through old genealogy charts, that show Who Do You Think You Are? is pretty interesting.  When my grandparents decided to downsize and move to a smaller home they had to clean out their house and have a sale.  My grandmother gave each of us grand kids a large manila envelope filled with letters, pictures and art projects we had made for her.  I was so surprised she had kept those things after all of those years.  I was probably around 30 years old or so when she gave me that envelope and now at 33 my parents are moving to a new town so they are cleaning out their home and my mother brought me a whole bunch of papers she had kept of mine while I was growing up.  It was so great to look through all of my old report cards from elementary.  I realized I was not as good of a reader as I thought I was during that time.  I got to see old class lists and class composites of my elementary classmates.  She kept some of my most interesting art projects and the one possession I've talked to friends about over the years but was sure I had thrown away.  When I was five years old I had a huge crush on Michael Jackson and so I made him a book.  I made the book out of purple construction paper that I had cut to make small pages.  I taped the book, which I did put together backwards, I included stickers and drawings I did with markers.  I drew a picture of Micheal and I hugging, one of us holding hands and one of us picking flowers.  I did use one crayon though, a white one and that was for his socks.  I put the book in a white envelope because I thought I was going to mail it to him some day.  One day while my mom was helping me pack up my room because we were moving to a new town she found the envelope in my dresser and saw the book.  I was mortified and so I thought for sure that in my embarrassment I threw the book away, yet here it was in a pile of things my mom had brought me.

It's really funny the things we remember about our childhoods and so I often wonder what my kids will remember about theirs.  I'm trying to take pictures more often and to write in their journals more. I do hope to at least have one decent scrapbook ready for each them at high school graduation and  I also have a large Rubbermaid container in my utility room that I've kept all of their special art projects, newspaper clippings, old report cards and notes in.  Some day I know they'll enjoy rummaging through that stuff.

Memory is a child walking along a seashore.  You never can tell what small pebble it will pick up and store away among its treasured things.  ~Pierce Harris, Atlanta Journal

Sunday, February 13, 2011

Snack Time

I will admit I absolutely love baking and am growing to love cooking.  I've always loved delicious pastries, pies, bars and cookies.  I love to create new dishes or improve old favorites.  If I could have my own Real Mom of Rural County cooking show I'd focus on quick easy meals, snacks and mostly desserts.  I do have a sweet tooth and at times would prefer dessert as the main course.  If you are like me you may get stuck in the rut of what to cook, what to bake, or what to have on hand for our kids for snacks.  I feel like I make the same ten meals and rotate them throughout the month and then I sit and think, "I wonder how many times a year I fix spaghetti?"  It seems like that's our go-to-meal when I just don't feel like thinking about what to make.  From now and then I will provide meal ideas and recipes for meals, snacks and of course delicious desserts.  One of my favorite snacks to make right now is Caramel Puffcorn.  It is a light fluffy puffcorn drenched in sweet and salty caramel sauce and baked to form a scrumptious candy crunch. The recipe below is for two batches because it is so addictive that your family will gobble it up in no time.

What you'll need for Caramel Puffcorn:
2 bags of Butter flavored Puffcorn
1 1/2 cups butter
2 cups brown sugar
2/3 cup white corn syrup
1 1/2 tsp. baking soda

Put butter, brown sugar and syrup in a large pot and bring to a boil.  Boil for five minutes then remove from heat and add baking soda.  Caramel will double in consistency.  Pour sauce over puffcorn in a large roaster.  Heat oven to 250 degrees and bake for 45 minutes, stirring every 15 minutes.  When done baking spread immediately on cookie sheets to cool.  After cooled store in air tight container, if there's any left!

"This is my invariable advice to people: Learn how to cook- try new recipes, learn from your mistakes, be fearless, and above all have fun!"
Julia Child (My Life in France)

Inspiration

I find inspiration daily in other mothers.  So much inspiration in fact that I think "Really?  How are these women accomplishing all that they do in their lives?"  I'll be on Face book and see posts from moms who've cleaned the house, baked cookies, ran five miles and sewn three baby blankets all before lunch!  I'd like to know what those mother's are on and where can I get some?  I've got friends and family who are going to college to either get a degree, finish a degree or further their education all while raising kids.  I can't imagine the energy and dedication it takes to go to college, run a household and raise kids.  I know mother's who've started their own businesses, who work full-time, who are work-from-home moms or stay-at-home moms.  Each is important and vital to our society.  Mothers shape the people who are running our country, who are preaching in our churches and who are changing the world.  I bet you never thought about what responsibility that bares, about how the most important job we will ever have is raising our children.

I think inspiration to be better mothers can not only be found in our friends and family members who are mothers but in our friends and family members who are fathers.  I see how my children respond to their father, grandfathers, uncles and family friends who are fathers and I realize that they don't expect them to be perfect or know all the answers.  They just want their undivided attention and that's all they want from me.  They want me to shut down the computer and read them a story, they want me to stop vacuuming to go outside to play and they want me to quit doing the dishes and sit down and eat with them.

Children aren't complicated creatures, they are pretty simple and they too are most inspirational.  They don't know the limitations society puts on people and they don't know the limitations adults put on their selves.  Children believe that anything and everything is possible and that they can be whatever they want to be.  We should take some lessons from them.  I've written before that the biggest risk in life is not taking a risk at all.  I try to force myself to take risks because you never know what will come of them.  If I continue to put myself outside of my comfort zone I believe I will be able to accomplish more than I've ever accomplished.  I wrote a book back in 2005, Mom University: The Student Guide, and it was nerve racking for me to have people to read it.  I realize how strange that may seem because what does one expect when they have a book published but I've always been anxious about others reading my writing.  I realize I need to overcome that fear so I can grow as a writer.  My best work can't come out if I can continue to hold back because I'm afraid of what people will think of my writing.  I started this blog as a way to hone my writing skills and force myself to allow others to read what I write.  In life if you don't take a gamble then you won't lose, but you won't win either.  The safe bet isn't always the best one.

"Life is either a daring adventure or nothing." Helen Keller

Friday, February 11, 2011

The Juggling Act

To say Motherhood is a juggling act is an understatement.  As I look at my calendar for next week I think...."Wow, why did I schedule so many things in one week??"  We've got doctors appts, dentist appts, parent/teacher conferences, visits to grandparents, early outs from school, young mothers group etc.  I guess I won't be watching The Talk next week and I'll have to try extra hard to squeeze in work-outs because those typically would be the first to go.

The thing is with children you have more crazy weeks than not.  We all try really hard to plan our days, weeks and months and stick to a schedule but at times its just best to throw the schedule out the window and start all over.  Things happen unexpectedly, people get sick or forget to take something to school or God forbid Mom forgets to write something on the calendar.  What we need to remember is our children are only young for short period of time.  I tell myself all the time to get through the more difficult times..."The kids are only young for a short period of time, there will be a day where they will no longer live with me, I need to cherish these times because they are gone all too quick."

I realize in the moment it is tough to feel this way, however, sometimes it's easier just let go of a little bit of the control, to let go of the fact that the house will NOT always be clean, or the laundry WON'T always get folded.  Screw the dusting and play with the kids, go outside, take them to the park, read stories, create stories, build forts, have fun, do crafts and bake.  When your children grow up what do you want them to remember about their childhoods?  That mom cleaned all the time, that mom was cranky, that mom cried a lot?  Or do you want them to remember that mom used to play games with us, she used to take us for ice cream and she used to let us climb trees and play in the mud.

We are all very different people with very different parenting styles but I don't think any of us want to watch our children leave the house one by one and wish that we would've spent more time with them while they were home.  All we can do is the best we can, we don't need to be supermom, there isn't an Oscar for Best Mom in a Leading Role in Life.  Cut yourself some slack and you don't need to make a big production, the best thing about children is that they are thrilled with the simple things in life, a few moments of quality time here and there is all they want.  I recently asked my children this quesion, "If you only had three wishes and you could wish for anything in the world what would you wish for?"  My eleven year old said she'd wish for a cell phone, $10,000 and a puppy.  Oh for life to be that simple again!

"Dream as if you'll live forever.  Live as if you'll die today."  ~James Dean

Thursday, February 10, 2011

Real Moms

I decided to start this blog as a resource for Real Moms to look to for advice, stories, meal ideas, saving tricks and just a plain old laugh now and then.  I named my blog Real Mom of Rural County (Real Housewives of Orange County) with reality t.v. in mind and actually had several other ideas for a title that could pertain to motherhood...

1.Survivor Mom (Survivor)
2. Mom vs. Child (Man vs. Wild)
3. Hell's Kitchen (Hell's Kitchen)
4. American's Next Top Mom (America's Next Top Model)
5. Clean My House (Pimp My Ride)
6. Deadliest Glare (Deadliest Catch)
7. The Amazing Race to Get Everything Done (The Amazing Race)
8. What Not to Wear (What Not to Wear)....once we became mom's I know we've all left the house in less than appealing attire a time or two!
9.  The Real World/Motherhood Challenge (The Real World/Road Rules Challenge)
10. Beauty and the Man the Kids Call Dad (Beauty and the Geek)

Motherhood is a wild and crazy ride and I think we function best in packs so let's stick together and share the knowledge, tips and tricks we've learned and make navigating the unchartered waters of motherhood a bit more enjoyable!

There will be much more to come but I want to leave you today with a quote I heard on the radio this morning:  "The biggest risk is not taking one at all."